I remember the reading of 1 Corinthians 13 in church or elsewhere as the one that made me feel most wanting. Here are all the things you are supposed to do to be loving, and I could see my failures in every place. I’m not patient. I’m not kind. I keep records of wrongs. I’m jealous. I don’t believe the best about people. I’m irritated. I’m offended. I delight in wrong sometimes. I give up on people. This was the mirror that magnified all my flaws and places I lacked the good Christian values. Now don’t get me wrong—I tried. I tried so hard to forgive, to love, to be kind and patient and all the things I was supposed to be. But I didn’t do a very good job, and the failings were blazing neon signs that I would repeat to myself as the reason I wasn’t yet good enough and needed to try harder.But now, I love this passage. I love it, not because I have finally mastered all of the things I’m supposed to do in my own strength, but because I gave up on that. I came to terms with the fact that I can’t drum up enough love for all of that.God is love (1 John 4:8), so everything in this passage is true about God. We can equate God and love. And Colossians 2:9-10 says that all of God is in Christ, and all of Christ is in God (thanks to my old teacher Kelly Doherty for having that ingrained in my head in such a poignant way); so therefore, we have all of Love within us. And we have been made complete in Him.If I live as a branch on the Vine (John 15), then the Vine’s lifeblood flows through me to bring forth fruit. And fruit looks like love. But the fruit wasn’t up to me to produce. Instead, as I rest and turn to Jesus for each moment, I have in Him all that I need.Sometimes this looks like patience for my kids when they ask me something for the hundredth time today. I can guarantee you I don’t have enough patience for that, but Jesus does. Sometimes this looks like kindness towards someone I don’t particularly like. Sometimes it means choosing not to compare my life with someone else’s because I recognize the jealousy that brings forth in me, and I can instead be thankful because of Jesus’ love within me which is not jealous.I don’t have to work hard to generate this from my own heart. I can, instead, take three seconds to breathe and ask Jesus to be my safe place, my faithful friend, my calm and quiet, my generous and considerate Lord. He is all these things to me, and out of His bounty, I can be all these things to others.Unfortunately, I don’t always choose it. But more and more, I see how His plenty is what I need and want. My love isn’t enough, and it fails a lot. But His Love is beautiful and tender, toward me and toward all of those around me who really need it. As I soak in His Love for me, this Love begins to pour out of me to others. This passage of Scripture is no longer a condemnation for me, but a promise of the outflow of His Life.Love is large and incredibly patient. Love is gentle and consistently kind to all. It refuses to be jealous when blessing comes to someone else. Love does not brag about one’s achievements nor inflate its own importance. Love does not traffic in shame and disrespect, nor selfishly seek its own honor. Love is not easily irritated or quick to take offense. Love joyfully celebrates honesty and finds no delight in what is wrong. Love is a safe place of shelter, for it never stops believing the best for others. Love never takes failure as defeat, for it never gives up. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
The Condemnation and Freedom of the Love Passage: A Different Perspective on 1 Corinthians 13